Apologies and so on.....

[JPotter57]

First, I am going to say that, yes, I removed the threads concerning the HotRod magazine `57 Custom 300.  My reasons are as follows:
1.  I said some things about someone elses car that I should have kept to myself or talked offline about.
2.  Said owner of car complained about my comments and other members comments in the open forum.
3.  Harsh feelings began to escalate and I decided that I needed to end it now, before I said something I would regret later.
4.  Nothing good or useful was going to come from any other online confrontation.
5.  It was not good for the image of `57 Fords International to have that kind of bickering and attitude display.

Now, I will say this, and all of us have been guilty of it at some time:  If you dont like it, keep it to yourself.  Someone, somewhere is the owner of the car you are talking about.  As for myself, I was talking about a car in a magazine, which I never expected to encounter the owner of, either here or in person, which is no excuse.  I begin thinking that these cars are entities unto themselves and that the owner is some faceless machine.  Apparently, this car's owner is a real person who gets real pissed when someone discusses his car in a way that sounds derogatory.  Everyone participating, myself included, noted that the car in question was great, but for some, just not what we would have done.
If you have a car, `57 Ford or otherwise, do to it what you would do.  This is what I am doing.  I lost sight of a fact that this is what that builder did, and when I said what I would have done to it differently, well, that set the world spinning off its axis, and the forum into a tailspin of harsh feelings and words.  I'm stopping it now.  Any other posts concerning this car or any other car which includes anything negative, will be removed as soon as possible.  If there is any post with any kind of superiority complex or just plain bad attitude, it's gone and the poster will be warned.
As I said before, most of us on this site are friends first, then car guys.  Some may be here just to show off their car before they sell it.  Thats fine too.  But from this point, there will be no more of what could be perceived by anyone to be the bashing of one's car.
So, to the party in question, I apologize to you for offending you.  Your car and it's builder, Randy DeLisio, are both top notch.  Now, lets get on with life and enjoy some `57 Fords.




Modified to remove dead horse graphic, which was not necessary.

[JPotter57]

I exchanged messages with another member this morning, and I will post a portion of my reply to him here.  He asked if the new policy of not commenting in a negative way included  posts where the owner asked for opinions.  My response is as follows:

That policy will only apply to unsolicited opinons, such as the magazine car.  Like I said in my post, I never expected to encounter the owner of a magazine car, and so was free with my comments of what I would do.  SInce that is the kind of conversations I have with my friends and my father when we are out at shows or just hanging out, I felt that since we were friends on here, I could do the same.  Since the owner of that car apparently has been a member here for some time, (member number was in the 6 hundred range, we have numbers up to 1650 or so), he probably just lurked until he saw his car being discussed.  At the time I deleted the two threads, his post count was 2.  He had been here for at least two years, maybe more, and finally posted when someone said they didnt like the stance of the car.  Then I pretty much rebuilt his car in my post...After re-reading what I had posted, I decided that I needed to end it right there.  I posted that when the thread first came up, about a month ago, right after subscribers got the mag in the mail.  I was surprised to see the anger in his post, or at least hurt feelings.  People hear the stuff about us cutting up our cars all the time, it doesnt bother me.  It didnt appear to bother you whenever everyone jumped onto you about the mods to your car.  It happens to all of us, sometimes, we disagree with the owner/builders vision of the cool `57.  What we all, myself included, need to remember, is that for the most part, we all have a `57, or we wouldnt be here.  We are doing the `57 the way we would if it was ours.  The way someone else does it may not fit our mold of coolness, but it apparently fits theirs, and that is all we need to see.  Another `57 was saved, and is being enjoyed.  I made some comments I should have kept to myself, or at most, talked about in person to someone, not posted here on this site.  I've probably alienated this guy from the site with my comments and my own crappy attitude, and for that, I am sorry.  After the automotive comments, I also commented that he should cool down the New York attitude, and that was way out of line.  I totally shouldnt have posted that, and probably wouldnt have had he not made a point of saying he was from New York.  This probably wasnt meant to be anything other than a statement of fact, but due to the atmosphere of that thread, I perceived it as the stereotypical New York, "I'm better than you" attitude, and to be honest, it pissed me off.  That kind of attitude has no place here and will not be tolerated at all.  If it wasnt meant that way, I apologize again for jumping to that conclusion.  Like I said, the atmosphere of that thread had already turned toxic.  

At some point, I will post an official policy for the forum, so that everyone understands going in how things will work.

I am the one that made the comments that upset the owner, from the color of his car, to the wheels and tires, to the stance and track width.  I tried to explain that the build was impeccable, it just wasnt what I would do, but that only made it worse.  I just took action the only way I thought could end it and try to control the damage.

Now, to try to move past this, if anyone has anything to add, please feel free, though I dont want to turn this thread into another argument with anyone.  Let's say what we have on our minds, and move along.

[RICH MUISE]

I wanted to add my apologies also to the owner of the '57 in hot rod magazine for any comments I might have made that could have been construed to be negative. I think most of us agreed that is truly an awesome car. I'm always thriled when someone goes the extra mile on a '57 ford, and they definetly went that extra mile.
That said, this is an open forum. Forums by nature are discusion areas. Those of us that frequent the site treat it like a club..no diferent than a bunch of guys sitting in a clubhouse sharing some brew and talking cars. We like to give our opinions, and hear other's opinions. We are fortunate that most of the time we have been able to do that here without offending anybody.
I guess we all need to think a little more about what we are saying in regards to unsolicited comments, and try to be more constructive than offensive in our criticisms when they are solicited. I've been on both sides of the offensive catagory myself, and sometimes it's just a matter of picking our words a little more carefully. I also think we maybe need to be a little more forgiving if someone makes an unfavorable comment...understanding that what makes car people unique and interesting is all the different tastes and approaches we have.This is an awesome website because of the open nature between  members and it takes an effort from all of us to keep it that way.   jmho   Rich

[wv 57s forever]

 i still hoped this was a club,it was when i joined. i still have my newsletters. with that said i didn't get to read the mans responce to your comments about his car but what part of the post i did get to read it seemed like you where only stating what you would have done differently, i myself always like to hear what others think so if i like there ideas then i will might try to use them next time. only my 2 cents worth.


PS, how about some of you guys who dont have yblocks in your cars come to Columbus this fall and race!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!